Thursday, June 16, 2011

Older Women

I'd love to give credit for the following, but I received it in an e-mail with no author listed.  It is thought provoking... gentlemen.  

A woman over 40 will never wake you in the middle of the night and ask, "What are you thinking?"  She doesn't care what you think. 

If a woman over 40 doesn't want to watch the game, she doesn't sit around whining about it.  She does something she wants to do, and it's usually more interesting.

Women over 40 are dignified.  They seldom have a screaming match with you at the opera or in the middle of an expensive restaurant.  Of course, if you deserve it, they won't hesitate to shoot you if they think they can get away with it.

Older women are generous with praise, often undeserved.  They know what it's like to be unappreciated. 

Women get psychic as they age.  You never have to confess your sins to a woman over 40. 

Once you get past a wrinkle or two, a woman over 40 is far sexier than her younger counterpart.

Older women are forthright and honest.  They'll tell you right off that you are a jerk if you are acting like one.  You don't ever have to wonder where you stand with her. 

Yes, we prefer women over 40 for a multitude of reasons.  Unfortunately, it's not reciprocal.  For every stunning, smart, well-coiffed, hot woman over 40, there is a bald, paunchy relic in yellow pants making a fool of himself with some 22-year-old waitress.  Ladies, I apologize. 

For all those men who say, "Why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free?" here's an update for you.  Nowadays 80% of women are against marriage.  Why?  Because women realize it's not worth buying an entire pig just to get a little sausage!

Monday, June 13, 2011

Random Monday in June

Have I ever mentioned that I hate Mondays?  When I was living in Charleston, I used to wear red every Monday because I find red to be a cheery color and I thought it might make me hate Mondays just a wee bit less.  It worked pretty well, but did not completely remove my negative feelings about Mondays.  For some reason, I am at my most comfortable in bed on Monday mornings right around the time the alarm starts going off.  By Friday it's easier to drag myself out of bed because -- well, it's Friday. 

I had a relatively unproductive weekend.  Other than doing my laundry and cleaning up the remains of the dishes after dinner (Richard is one of those jewels of a cook who washes up as he goes), I read.  I finished The Bitch-Proof Suit (De-Ann Black) on Saturday (reviews later), started reading Strange Bedpersons (Jennifer Crusie) and finished it later that day; then I started Summer Rental (Mary Kay Andrews) and finished it on Sunday; and then I started This Matter of Marriage (Debbie Macomber) on Sunday afternoon.  Sometimes my reading just goes like that; I can't seem to get enough of it. 

I may have mentioned this before (but I'm too lazy to go back and look), but when I was in library school I took a young-adult literature course.  One of the books we had the option of reading was The Handmaid's Tale by Margaret Atwood.  I sat down one weekend and didn't get up until I had finished the thing.  It was one of the most depressing books I have ever read.  As I told my professor later, it took reading three murder mysteries to cheer me up.

I wasn't depressed this past weekend, I was just in the mood to read romances.  I love the endings.  That's also what I love about romantic-comedy movies -- happy endings.  I think that's also what I like about mysteries.  The endings aren't always necessarily happy happy, but the bad guy usually gets his just desserts and that makes for a satisfying ending. 

The weather forecast for the next few days is for HEAT99 today and 101 tomorrow!  Last summer was particularly hot as well, and then we had an unusually cold winter (for south Georgia).  I feel like I'm living in Death Valley.  We are having another drought.  Richard has decided to have a well dug for the purpose of irrigation.  Using city water for the lawns and flowers is frowned upon during a drought. 

Well, about fifteen minutes ago the fire alarm went off in the building and it was not a drill.  Fortunately, it was also not a fire.  There was something amiss in one of the rooms on the ground floor, but it's been handled.  OK, back to the blog.  The excitement's over.

It was actually nice outside -- in the shade.  There was a gentle breeze blowing and I was sitting on a bench under a tree waiting for the all clear. 

I have embraced e-bills and online payments.  I absolutely love not having to sit down and write a bunch of checks, stuff and seal envelopes, find return address labels and stamps and wait days until my account is cleared.  My bank is a wonderful institution, and they will pay any bill to any creditor.  I also don't have to shred so much paper.  Yay!  I've also become a recycling fool.  Every scrap of paper that doesn't need to go through the shredder and every bit of plastic goes into the bins, not to mention glass and metal. 

I'm going to miss one of my favorite events this year, the Harriette Austin Writers Conference in Athens.  I had to spend an inordinately large amount of cash to upgrade my glasses (I wear three different pairs: computer, dress, and shades, all bifocals).  I debated long and hard about it, but I just can't afford it this year.  I will miss all my Athens friends, but maybe Richard and I can make a trip up there later in the year. 

One of my dear friends turned 50 a few weeks ago.  I got to attend both a surprise luncheon and a party the next night.  Both events were a lot of fun.  I got to talk to people I don't see very often and I met her daughters and other members of her family.  I also had good food.  The lunch was held at a restaurant I had never been to before, so that was an experience.  It's a classy little place.  I had a chicken-salad-on-croissant sandwich and a cup of soup.  At the other party, we had a Low-Country Boil, which is potatoes, corn on the cob, smoked sausage, and shrimp cooked in water seasoned with Old Bay.  There was salad and bread, appetizers, and tons of really good cookies (like macadamia nut and white chocolate chip; yum!). 

Low-Country Boil is what people in Georgia call the above-described meal.  In South Carolina we call it either Beaufort Bog or Frogmore Stew.  Whatever it's called, it's good. 

Shrimp is my favorite protein, but I tried a new recipe a while back which turned out to be an insult to shrimp.  I thought it would be tastier.  I was wrong.  I tossed the recipe in the recycle bin. 

Richard and I have quite a library of cookbooks, some of which we hardly ever touch.  I suggested getting rid of those little-used ones but Richard decided it might be better if we tried a few new things.  So the current plan is to try a recipe out of one of those books once a month, minimum.  We'll see how that goes.  We could find ourselves adding to our repertoire. 

There will be a Father's-Day gathering with the in-laws.  We haven't been to their house since Christmas and I'm looking forward to it.  At the birthday party I mentioned above, they were playing rock-&-roll oldies from the era that I grew up in and my 50-year-old friend was born into.  I think I'll get on iTunes and download some oldies for the road trip on Father's Day. 

Well, I guess I've babbled on long enough.  I hope everybody stays cool and comfy in this awfully hot weather.  I know I'm going to spend as little time out in it as I can.  Hug your kitties and doggies, and take care.